Single and Bitter?

A lot has been on my heart lately. I haven't been making time for God. Really, my life has been a blur of work, sleep, and exercising. I went to church this past Sunday, and it was refreshing. There's a worship concert at church on Friday which I plan on going to. Ever since my fiance left me, I've felt empty. I had filled the void, where only God fits, with my ex. Then I tried filling it with working myself to death. Well... I'm learning to accept that God is the only thing that should fill me. In a sense, I'm angry with God. For my mom's death, for my fiance leaving, for things just not going right. God allowed those things to happen. They're to make me stronger. He will bring me through them. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." ~Romans 8:28

Slowly, I'm chipping away at my bitterness. Part of it is contributed to exercising more. My endorphins have gotten more abundant, thus causing me to be happier. What an amazing God we have. To make our bodies work with itself. I mean, I would never have thought of making us happier when we exercise consistently. Basically, stay fit, be happier. Most of it is that I'm coming back to God. It's not that I went and joined a cult or completely strayed from Him. I had decided that I could do things on my own. I thought I was strong enough. Maybe I'm STRONG enough to just get by, but why "just get by" when I can be comforted by the creator of this earth? He is sufficient. He knew me before I was born, and He will still know me after I've been dead for a thousand years. How amazing is it that our God knows how many tears we have cried, and will cry? He knows how many hairs are on our heads.

That was a small rabbit trail. I want to talk about bitterness and singleness. Honestly, they sometimes go hand in hand. I've been there. I'm single right now. For a while, I was able to say, "Oh well. God will bring someone to me when He feels I'm ready." Now it's gotten a little more difficult. I have to trust in Him. I don't want a repeat of my last relationship. Totally not worth the pain. So, where does that leave me? Slightly sad and majorly bitter. A wise man once said to me, "Bitterness is like drinking poison and waiting for the other guy to die."How true is that? You're sitting there stewing, fermenting. Eventually, it WILL consume you. The other guy either doesn't know, or doesn't care. If he doesn't know, you should have talked to him right away. If he doesn't care, let God deal with him. Life is so much easier lived happily in Jesus.

An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband.~1 Corinthians 7:34. Learning to live happily while single after seeing the joys in being in a relationship is difficult. But I take comfort in the verse above. Dedicate your time to God and He will bless you! Not just your spare time. Make time for Him! The very least you can do for your creator is give him some time in your day.

Give it some thought: What can you prune in your life to make more room and time for God?

~B

Bestie oh bestie

I'm very worried for the soul of my best friend. She confided in my boyfriend and I that she no longer even believes in Jesus. Part of that is that she was never taught to go to church regularly. Another is that she, at one point, had other best friends who were Christians. And they left her. Just completely abandoned her because, well, she's full of drama. She's an only child, and when things don't go the way she's planned them, she gets very upset. That's beyond the point though. The fact is that the friends who abandoned her really tainted the name of Christians. Well, now, she and I are best friends, and a few of the girls who abandoned her are also my friends. As far as I've observed, that's all water under the bridge. I've talked to those girls about what happened too. And they've told me that they regret doing that in the way they did so. They wanted her to have friends, but they just didn't want to be those friends. I can completely understand that because there are some days that I just want to tell her to leave, but would that be showing Christ's love? NO! Not even a little bit. It's something I've been losing sleep over, and I just don't know how to approach her about it. I know that I can't just push it on her, but how do I encourage her to attend church with me? Prayer, I know, is my biggest weapon in this battle against Satan's control. James 4:7 "Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you."
On a completely different and more positive note, my boyfriend has completely taken off in his relationship with Jesus. He's been taken under the wing of one of my best friends, who is also my ex, and has joined a bible study and a college aged youth group on the UW Madison campus. I'm so happy about it because it is so good for him. The one thing that worries me is that his friend is moving back soon, and that friend brings out the worst in him. I brought it to his attention tonight, and said that he's a completely different person when this friend is around. I think he realizes it, but doesn't know how to be "better". So, though I know I can't control him, I would like him to limit the hours he spends with this friend. It's just not good company. 1 Corinthians 15:33 "Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character."

Maybe you, dear friends, should examine your friendships, and even your relationships with co workers to see if your good character is being corrupted by bad company.

~B

Retaliation

Matthew 5:39 "But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also." A Christian needs not retaliate... especially to their superiors. I stress this even more so if their superiors are not saved. How can one show their faith if they're acting just as the world does. We're supposed to be IN the world, but not OF the world. By retaliating, one is playing right into their hands. I admit that it's not easy when one's grown up like this, but wouldn't things be a bit calmer if you started the peace treaty? Unbelievers can't be held to the same standards as believers are. They're just not at that same level of understanding. Jesus loved the unbelievers through their trials and their "ugly moments". Isn't our job as Christians supposed to be to follow Jesus' example? So, I'm telling you to love these people even though their unbelieving attitudes rear their ugly heads more often than not.
How can you be a witness to them if you're doing the exact same thing back by arguing with them? How can you not be concerned for their future to the point that you don't even show them the love of Jesus? They're going to get to their judgement and question, "Why didn't he ever insist on this? Why did he never show us this? And why did he act this way, but still gets the reward of eternal life with Jesus?" Can you live with the guilt? Bitterness might allow you to. It's allowed me to thus far, but I don't think I'll be able to live with it when unbelievers who have taken big roles in my life meet their judgement. I can't say who's saved and who's not. All I can say is whether or not people are showing signs of being saved. And if they're not showing such signs, then witness to them as best you can. Even if they don't accept Christ on that occasion, you've planted a seed and are building up your rewards in heaven.
B

College Lessons

College has really changed my perspective on just about everything.... Ok... Not THAT much. But I've gone from the girl who has her huge group of strong Christian friends to pray with her about struggles to one with very few Christians around her. Boy does that take a toll on my spiritual life. But I know that my Jesus still loves me, and I still love Him. I try to be that girl who people can come to with their problems, but what they really need is to talk to Jesus; me included. Isaiah 41:10 says, "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." God is always there for us!!!

"We love because he first loved us." 1John 4:19

What does that mean? What really is love? Is love that stupid little card that says, "Be Mine" on one day? I think it's something much greater. How did God love us? "For God so LOVED the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have everlasting life. God did not send his son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." John 3:16-17. Adam and Eve committed sins, and through them we are sinful beings, but through Christ, our spirits can be renewed and saved! How amazing has Jesus been to you? He could take the foulest criminal and wipe his slate white as snow. "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." Romans 12:2. How can you reject God's saving grace? We're dawdling away our lives, people! If you're a Christian, why should you care how others will react to your witnessing? Be bold for Jesus! Even if you're witnessing to a gang, and they kill you, YOU GET TO SEE JESUS! You're storing up your rewards in heaven. Those "Christians" who put on the right facade at church, but once they're out of the building are saying the foulest things, are not good examples of Christ. "The greatest single cause of atheism in this country is Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, then walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle. Thats what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable" DC Talk "What if I Stumble?" By proclaiming that you're a Christian, and then not showing it by your actions, you're causing others to turn away from God. Can you live with that?
-B

This is just to show....

Jesus love to the corners of the world and back. I love Him! Think about it...When will you realize you need Him? Jesus, our brother, our savior, our friend. He wants you to open up your heart to Him and take hold. Jesus didn't have to die for your sins, and He certainly didn't have to die for mine, but He did anyways. He withstood the pain of nails in each of His hands and His feet and the crown of thorns on His head. You can't even begin to imagine the pain that Jesus suffered for you. And yet He still loves you even if you are the most wanted man or woman in this world. Jesus' heart has a place in it for each of us, and He wants to say "Well done, good and faithful servant" when we stand before the throne of our Heavenly Father. Do you want to hear that or do you want to hear, "I didn't know, you"? I know you all want to hear that we did well in fishers of men for our savior.